Enter the Yoga Rock Star

The yoga zone is a place of non-judgment, which is why I thought this post over for about 11 hours before ultimately deciding to go ahead and write it.  The truth is that 99% of the time spent on my mat is spent focusing on no one else but myself.  I don't notice or care what anyone else is doing.  But when one chooses to make a spectacle of one's self, well, it's hard not to notice.  And people, seriously--being noticed on your mat is not what this is all about.

Enter the Yoga Rock Star.

Now mind you, I love yoga, and I love rock stars, but what I have a very hard time stomaching is a Yoga Rock Star.  First and foremost, in my experience the Yoga Rock Star is always a male.  I have no doubt there are females of the type out there as well, but I haven't encountered them.  The Yoga Rock Star is the guy who, as you are laying on your back waiting for class to begin, sets up next to you and decides to do--you know, just as a little warm up--a freaking headstand.

Really?  You warm up with a headstand?  Who does that?

Someone who cares more about looking cool on his mat than he does about anything else, most likely.

I get very, very distracted when some Yoga Rock Star sets up next to me with his fancy Lululemon or Manduka mat, strips off his shirt, and starts showing off.  This one time I was next to a guy who felt the need to kick off into a handstand after every. single. downwardfacingdog.  (And if you've ever been in a vinyasa yoga class, you know there are a lot of downward facing dog poses.)  It is distracting, Yoga Dude!  Please stop!

Listen, folks.  Friends don't let friends be Yoga Rock Stars. And the chicks don't think you're sweet just because you are rockin' it out and dripping sweat all over your mat while the rest of us are just trying to hold a tree pose.  Your rapid movements in my peripheral vision are keeping me from holding my drishti.  No one is here to impress anyone, okay?  Okay.

This is a yogi who also happens to be a rock star.  You are not Adam Levine.  Please stop.